95: "I can't stop eating even though I'm full" Non-diet tricks to leave food on your plate

Lyndi Cohen: 0:02

Hello, lovely human, welcome to this week's podcast episode of the no One's Wankery podcast. I'm Lynne Cohen, a dietitian, nutritionist and a human who's just had a wonderful holiday, and I'm joined by Jenna.

Jenna D'Apice: 0:14

DePies. Hello, yes, it's such a been such a lovely break the whole holiday period. You do so much eating, so much sitting, so much socializing and feeling loaded and heavy after you eat. It's not fun If you feel like you've eaten too much and you feel like you can't stop it's it's. It can dampen the mood.

Lyndi Cohen: 0:32

And also if you've got a history of dieting, oh my goodness, it can be such a bin fire. It can make you feel so bad about yourself, and we don't want any of that, because let's not ruin what was a very enjoyable holiday, or what is still an enjoyable holiday, by hating on your body and feeling like there's something wrong with you. So today we're talking about what do we do if we can't stop eating, even when we are full. Now I have to full disclaimer. This is a very common situation. Many people struggle with this, so if you are one of these humans, please know you are normal, there's nothing wrong with you, and we're going to give you some tips to help you navigate it. In fact, there's 10 tips that we've got for you, so it's juicy.

Jenna D'Apice: 1:11

It is juicy and remember, it's not always easy when you do overeat, and sometimes it happens and that's okay. And if you feel guilty about eating you've eaten too much. Then we go back to episode 54. And that's all about what to do after you've eaten too much straight after. So episode 54 could be helpful. But this is tips, so it doesn't happen again.

Lyndi Cohen: 1:31

So let's start with number one. The most important thing we need to prevent ourselves from doing that our dieting brain automatically is going to default to is to try and compensate for what we have eaten by skipping our meal or saving calories. The problem with this is this allows us to get too ravenous, and then this is when most out of control eating happens. It means that we end up going, oh I feel deprived emotionally or physically, and it's basically just setting us ourselves up to eat more at the next meal.

Jenna D'Apice: 2:03

So it's all about when you're arriving to a party or a function. We need to find that sweet spot of you don't want to arrive too hungry, but you don't want to arrive full. You want to be ready for food but not too hungry. So how do you get that balance?

Lyndi Cohen: 2:17

I used to you know, back in like when I was fresh out of university and was still like disordered eating days. One of the tips that I do actually remember writing for a magazine was to arrive at a party hungry, because that way the calories get to go on all the foods that you really like. I think that is really bad advice now and I'm very sorry for anyone who read that article. I sincerely apologize because I think that is faulty thinking Now to get us to the point where we arrive just like perfectly hungry and of course that's not always going to happen. But really what we can do is we can a tune into our hunger and go. Am I actually hungry during the day? So we knew okay, let's go, I've got a lunch out today. If I have a really big breakfast right now, I might not be hungry for that lunchtime party, so I might just have a slightly lighter breakfast as opposed to having a big one.

Lyndi Cohen: 3:05

This isn't about calories. This is more about the fullness sensation. You still want to finish your breakfast, for example, and be comfortably full, but you just want to feel like it wasn't as hearty as it possibly could have been. So, for example, I normally have a breakfast yogurt, muesli, nut butter and some berries. Now if I was going to a lunch that day and I was like, okay, I want to be like comfortably hungry and be really excited about that food, I probably just go with some muesli with milk and that is probably just going to mean that by the time I get there I'm going to be comfortably hungry. That's what I would do.

Jenna D'Apice: 3:41

And I think also something that works for me if I have a function. Like I remember, last week I had a lunch at one o'clock and at 11, I was just ravenously hungry and I was like I need a snack, like I need a snack even not to push through to lunch because I'm going to be too hungry when I get there. So snack time, like still listen to your body. When you're really hungry, you don't need to wait until the function. You still need to eat.

Lyndi Cohen: 4:03

Spot on. So we're not skipping meals or we're not saving calories, we're not arriving ravenous. I kind of call this the the Goldilocks principle we want to arrive hungry, but we don't want to be too hungry. If you can try to get that Goldilocks principle nailed down, then I think it's a good way to be.

Jenna D'Apice: 4:17

Tip number two all about we talk about this all the time but crowding Practice. Crowding in more of the foods you want to eat. Not focusing on all the foods that you think you shouldn't be eating or you don't want to eat. Focusing on packing in more of the fruit and the veggies and the things that they're going to make you feel really good.

Lyndi Cohen: 4:35

Yeah, so can we talk about going to the toilet right now? So during the holiday, if you're like me, I'm someone who I go on holiday and I just can't go to the toilet. It can be days, it can be days and then it starts to ruin my holiday because I feel really, my tummy is sore, I feel bloated, I feel thick, I just need to go. So I think that's an important thing. So we can think about what can I add in more fiber to help myself go to the toilet? Maybe I haven't actually had a bowel motion in a long time, and so I think you got to think about that. How can you add in a little bit more fiber? Now, remembering fiber might be something like chia seeds or oats or whole grain bread, any of those kinds of things, including fruits and vegetables particularly the skin so please don't peel your skin and legumes such a brilliant source of fiber seeds and nuts. So now you can already see I've listed a bunch of stuff that is incredibly healthy for you. If you crowd in more of these foods to help your tummy feel good, you will naturally crowd out the less healthy options. What this means is you rock up to a restaurant, you look at the menu and you go what should I eat? Instead of going, oh, okay, I think the salad the healthiest, lowest calorie option. You go okay, I think the salad is what's going to give you the most fiber in the situation and the most vegetables and most of the stuff. So I probably will go for the salad. You can see how you end up going with the healthiest choice, but versus the diet culture of roots which tells you you have to choose the salad because it's the lowest calorie option. We're thinking about food and what it gives us instead of what we can avoid. And just one more tip on your tummy, on your bowels if you are going on holiday and you also struggle with bowel movements, remembering we do need to drink a lot of water. If you think about a slide and you compare that to a water slide, which one is easier to go down? The water slide. So what we wanna be doing is drinking enough water to lubricate everything and that just helps everything come down the slide a whole lot easier. So remember there's two components we have fiber, but we also have hydration. Now, if you're not drinking enough water and you're drinking too much alcohol, which is a diuretic, you are really gonna be compounding this issue Now, particularly if you are coming out of the holiday season.

Lyndi Cohen: 6:53

You're going oh, I feel like I drank too much alcohol. I didn't know what to do. I feel like it's a bit ugh. Something you can do is try a little booze break. I did a little booze break and now it's turned into a very long booze break and I couldn't be happier. My anxiety is pretty much disappeared. I have so much more energy. You don't need to commit to a life sentence. This is just like a tiny little blip of time when you go. Listen, I'm just gonna explore my relationship with alcohol, see if I can create a healthier relationship with alcohol, so that when I do start drinking, if I want to, I don't feel like I'm just constantly drinking, that I'm getting to this point of feeling like I've regret or shame or guilt and wishing was a habit, but not feeling like I can stop it. So if you want to try booze break, we are doing a current intake at the moment, though I will leave a link below so you can join booze break and come and create a healthier relationship with alcohol with me.

Jenna D'Apice: 7:42

We love that. It's a good time to maybe focus on news resolutions that aren't like other news resolutions. It's not like a life sentence I'm never drinking again, it's. I want to try something and see how it goes for me. So tip number three we want to have a little chat about this one. It is place a napkin over your food when you are full. But you have some thoughts. Lindy, what are your thoughts on this advice?

Lyndi Cohen: 8:04

Well, I think this tip comes from a blog post I think I wrote in 2016,. 26 year old Lindy was different from 33 year old Lindy. There has been an evolution. So I think what was really important about this tip is placing a napkin over your plate when you feel full. Is that it was more to kind of create a signal to your body going you know? Just a reminder we are finish eating. I'm not hungry anymore, so therefore, any food, any picking I do is going to just be mindless eating. I'm really. It's not about hunger. I think that was the intention behind it.

Lyndi Cohen: 8:35

But also part of me can't help but think that this tip can sometimes feel a little bit like when you have disordered eating and you try and like destroy food so you can no longer eat it. So the temptation isn't there. You might flush down the toilet. People put it in dirty nappies. You do all sorts of things to try and make sure that you can't get that food again. So I've learned this thing is what feels restrictive to some person might feel not restrictive to another person, and that depends how long you've been dieting, how far into a recovery process you are, whether or not something like that can go, or that triggers me a little bit or that feels really helpful, so just putting that out there in case listen, that is a useful little sign for you to go. If the meal is done and if it feels at all like it's unhelpful, screw it ignore it.

Jenna D'Apice: 9:21

That is like cause. It's a very good tip in terms of it's all about the thoughts you have behind it. Are you putting the napkin over it cause you're genuinely full, or are you putting the napkin over it cause you're like I should be full, I should stop. So like the intention's very different and that could work for some people and it could not work for other people.

Lyndi Cohen: 9:38

Exactly so. Something I talk about in Binge Free Academy, which is kind of like my it's pretty incredible my flagship product to help you stop binge and emotional eating, and one of the things I talk about is this idea of desensitizing yourself to these restrictions. And so we go through these many phases of recovery and one time at one point, you will reach a point where these kinds of restrictions don't feel restrictive anymore. You can start to add in healthy habits, you can feel better in your body and if you are really deeply struggling with not being able to stop eating when you feel full, if you feel like, oh, I keep doing this and I'm taking on these tips and the tricks and they're just not working, then maybe have a look at Binge Free Academy. It's everything I wish I knew when I was a chronic binge eater, compulsive binge eater. I have taken everything I know from 22 years of experience, personal and professional, and I've condensed into 30 lessons to help you get the best recovery in the shortest period of time.

Lyndi Cohen: 10:35

Fundamentally, in Binge Free Academy you also get eight live group coaching sessions with me. I even have a really cool bonus called style your body for confidence, because I don't think that getting dressed in the morning should derail your health. There's a mindfulness guide. There's lots of recipes. It is a new way of thinking about food. So if you are thinking I want to get on top of this thing of not being able to stop eating when I feel full, feeling crazy around food. I want to feel normal around food, then check out Binge Free Academy. I will leave a link down below so you can find out more.

Jenna D'Apice: 11:07

I love that. I'm so excited for all the people to join, that it's such a good program and you feel like recovery is not possible and it so is, and it actually makes me really excited. Tip number four, and that is to, if you feel like you're full, move the plate out of sight. What are your thoughts on this? Could go either way as well with the napkin.

Lyndi Cohen: 11:29

This is similar to the napkin situation for me, but you know what I noticed? That a lot of unicorns and remembering what I think a unicorn is is that natural, intuitive eater. I noticed that they do this. They either put their napkin on their plate or they move their plate away. It doesn't have to be out of sight. They simply sometimes just push it a little bit away and my diet brain would think, oh, they're doing that as a way of controlling what they're eating. And then I thought, nah, nah, that's just the thing they do, because in their brain they don't need to exert control and tell themselves they have to stop, because they have a trusting relationship with food. They just know it's time to eat. And so I think that's why it's so worthwhile creating that trusting relationship with food, because it can get to the point where that does not feel at all restrictive. That is just a very helpful habit.

Jenna D'Apice: 12:17

Yeah, because if you fully trust that food is available whenever you're like less interested, when you're full and you're like, eh, that can move away from me now, I'll have it again later when I am ready for it. Tip number five this is about when you are out and about restaurants and that is just to order a little bit one less plate or one less meal and then wait until they arrive and see if you've ordered enough, if you need more.

Lyndi Cohen: 12:41

Do you know? The only way I'm able to do this without triggering my body to think that I'm trying to eat less is to say I'm leaving room for dessert and to truly mean it. And if, after my meal, I still feel like I have not eaten enough and I want something else, then I eat dessert and it's great. So it's such a win-win situation. You're either going to eat enough for your body or you're going to eat not quite enough, and then you're going to get certain that you're going to either way, walk away feeling comfortably full, and not walk away from a restaurant feeling like you spend too much money, that you feel overly full, you feel bloated, you feel ick, you feel blur. So I think this is a really easy thing that we can work on. It might be something you go this is, might be something I want to work on this year.

Jenna D'Apice: 13:23

I love that because so often the dessert comes and if you're saying no, it's not generally because I don't want dessert. Of course I want dessert, but I'm too full and then I can't fit it in. So, yes, we need to make sure we can save space for the things like ice cream. We need to make sure they are in there. Tip number six is about getting your food to go. You don't need to eat it all if it's there. If you're full, you can put it in containers, take it away, eat it later.

Lyndi Cohen: 13:53

I hate food waste as much as the next person, but I think an idea that I've always do like is that food is wasted if it goes in the bin and you didn't eat it. But it's also wasted if it goes in your body and you didn't eat it. It's just a different kind of food waste. Your body didn't need those extra nutrients. I think it's kind of one of the useful thing that we can think about. I got a compost that definitely helped me thinking about that or going. All food's not really wasted If it's going back into my soil and that's going back into my garden, then that does help. And, janet, you put another thing that's kind of. Another point is tip number seven is if you're a full, then what do you do? I think it's quite an interesting one.

Jenna D'Apice: 14:34

A lot of the time if I'm full and I see that there's enough for a whole nother meal, then that kind of stops me from eating it, because I'm like if I pick at that, then there's half a meal and then I'm going to be too full and that's not enough for tomorrow. Then I feel like the food's going to get wasted. So a lot of the time that does stop me because I'm like I'm actually genuinely full now and there's my whole lunch for tomorrow. If I don't touch it I've got a whole nother meal. You sound like a thrifty queen.

Jenna D'Apice: 15:01

Yes, I'm so into it, otherwise you end up. I've eaten one and a half meals and then half's not good enough for tomorrow.

Lyndi Cohen: 15:08

That works for me.

Lyndi Cohen: 15:09

It is also such a good way to save money. I think that is so, so cool. Two things One is, if you're wanting to save money as well when you're eating out, you can get this app called Eat Club and it gives you all these big discounts if you eat a little bit earlier. So like if you're like me and you eat at 5pm huge discounts and get it. It's a great app. And the other thing that you can do is if you are trying to save money by cooking at home more. I'm giving you 20 recipes that are affordable, that are easy, that are my go to, because I feel like the cost of living at the moment is making us all feel quite crunched and pressured, and I don't want that for you. So if you need a little bit more inspiration in the near to cook some healthy stuff at home, I'll leave a link to get that ebook below and you can get 20 recipes to save you money.

Jenna D'Apice: 15:56

So if you want that, there'll be a link in the show notes, but also if you go on any of Lindy's Instagram post nude, underscore nutritionist and type thrifty, boom, you'll get the link. You can download it. Boom, just like that, boom. I think we're up to tip number eight, and that is just delaying your first drink. If you're at a function and you're feeling like you're eating too much, alcohol can be a real big thing that can lead to that mindless eating. So delaying your first drink maybe having a water, having something else, and then you're a drink behind everyone else, your one drink more in control of what you're doing, and it's a good tip.

Lyndi Cohen: 16:31

Yeah, because drinking really does low out inhibitions. That's why we say silly things when we are drinking alcohol that we will later regret the next day. I've said many duff things, and it's also why a lot of people find there's a very clear link between drinking alcohol and emotional eating or binge eating. So if you're noticing, okay, once I have a drink it feels like I can't control myself and my food spirals out of control, then it's actually a clue that you need to work on your relationship with alcohol. Once again, if you want to try booze break at the moment, that is such a smart thing to be doing. You're going to find, by working on your relationship with alcohol, that you're also working on your relationship with food. So you can grab a link to try booze break in the notes below.

Jenna D'Apice: 17:11

Tip number nine. This has been a big thing that has helped me in my recovery from binge eating. If someone brings out food and it's nice and fresh and hot, what I used to do when I was binge eating is that was my willpower was really strong then and I wouldn't eat it when it was nice and fresh and then I would wait half an hour until it was cold and then my willpower wore off and then I would eat it. And I've seen myself do that so many times in my recovery. I've like, so flipped that switch and it's so helpful. It's like when the food comes out, I'm like it's really nice right now. This is when I want to eat it, when it's fresh and tastes good, and then, if I've left it there for 20 minutes, I'm like I didn't eat it when it tasted really good. I'm not going to pick at it now. I'm full and it doesn't even taste fresh.

Lyndi Cohen: 17:58

And I think fundamental to this is kind of having this point of being able to tell yourself anytime I want to have tasty food, I can have tasty food. It's always available to me. I call this food trust. It is so fundamental. It's everything I teach you how to do in Binge Free Academy, because it is the crux of being able to have food on your plate and leave it To have a few bites of dessert and go. You know what? No, I'm all good, I don't need any more. And I just want to add one more thing, a reminder. One of the things I noticed I was doing as a parent is I'd be making my toddler his lunch for the next day and I found myself mindlessly eating his offcuts sad, crappy crust of his sandwich, things that don't taste good, and this is my reminder to you building what Jenna said.

Lyndi Cohen: 18:46

You are allowed to eat food that is tasty and delicious, that you purpose make for yourself or you get for yourself. You do not need to eat sad offcuts or food that is soggy or not good. Once you have food trust, once you have the full belief that anytime I want more food, I can have food, you're able to actually do this. And this is how you see those unicorns who are going no, I'm full, I don't need to eat anymore. They are not using willpower. They have a healthy relationship with food and everyone.

Lyndi Cohen: 19:14

I hope you have enjoyed listening to today's episode about why you can't stop eating when you feel full. If you need help with this, this is my bread and butter. This is something I can absolutely help you with. Help you become one of those unicorns who finds that you just don't need to use any willpower. You just stop eating because you know and trust food is always there. If you want, join me in Binge Free Academy. I'd love to make this the year you finally feel relaxed and in control around food. Thanks for listening. We'll see you in next week's episode.